Friday, January 24, 2014

Mia Appologia

I hesitate to say it, because I know it sounds pretentious and it's going to jinx me, but I'm going to go ahead and say it anyway...

I'm writing a book.

Yeah, I know.

How is that different from my New Year's resolution to swim laps three times a week?

And BTW, before we get to the matter of the book, how's the swimming going?, you might ask.

It's very cold outside.  The wind blows the snow into the driveway.  And Josh has basketball and archery on Saturdays.  

Swimming is not going all that well. 

Please, let's not get all negative on me now.  (That's a Bob Dylan lyric, isn't it?)

I am.  Writing.  A book.

I'm sorry, but I'm not going to tell you what it's about, because every time I do that, (I've done it three times), I feel the energy of it drain away from me.  I want to keep that energy for the book.  (If this sounds like a Victorian argument against the wasteful spilling of seminal fluid, I don't care.)

I think there might be lots of interesting stuff to say about the writing-a-book-experience without spilling, as it were.

But first, there's something I've got to get off my chest:  I'm sorry!

I apologize in advance for the following items:
  • For holing up, more or less, until this book is written.  (Don't look for me at the pool.)  
  • For not participating in altruistic activities,  as I otherwise would if I weren't engaged in the narcissistic pursuit of literary immortality. 
  • For being cheap with money because my hours of writing are not in any way billable.
  • For being even more of an airhead than usual--yes, it's possible--because I am caught up in a fictional world loosely based on a true story.
  • For not keeping up with things generally, for the reasons noted above.
I hope that those of you who are affected by any of this will understand.  If you've noticed no difference whatsoever, then you are a happy person whose expectations of others are properly calibrated, and you shall never suffer the slings and arrows of, um, disappointment.  

Most of all, I hope that my modest sacrifice of time, money, and grace will be worth it.  


That's Latin for we shall see.  Now that I'm an almost-famous author, I will be peppering my posts with Latin and French. 

You might want to print them out.  They might be valuable one day!

One more thing.  I apologize in advance if I turn into a pompous literary ass.  I doubt that will happen, but it is one of the occupational hazards of becoming a famous author.

Au revoir!

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